A clean bathroom...

Over the past couple of days, I've noticed my emotions kind of running away with themselves. I find myself experiencing brilliant moments of happiness and then moments later, I find myself plunging into a dark, damp abyss. Maybe it's PMS; maybe it's the weather; or perhaps I'm finally recognizing that problems can eventually catch up even if you cross an ocean to avoid them.

With the 'credit crunch', which has become one of my favorite hot button terms, in full and uncontrolled swing right now, even an entire summer of slaving away at a full- and a basically full-time job couldn't have prepared me for the financial woes of living in a country that has the most expensive exchange rate in the world. After speaking to my mom yesterday about my trip to Germany, she warned me that it was really expensive in Germany and that the US dollar was only worth €.70.
'Mom,' I reminded her, 'it's only worth £.57 here. '
'Wow,' she said. 'I didn't realize it was that bad.'

This made me realize that it isn't PMS or the weather that has me down - it's the fact that my world is collapsing, and for the time being, I'm standing outside the fire, watching everything burn. I've been over here for just over a month and I can't believe how much has happened in that short of a time. I read an article on CNN this morning that began to detail the timeline of the recent economic downfall - all starting on September 14th with Lehman Brothers going down the crapper. The rest is history from there.

The thing that gets me the most isn't so much that the world is crashing, but that the world is blaming the US. In this kind of a situation, wouldn't it be best for the leaders to work together to pull the world economy out of this hole instead of saying,

Dear US:
This is all your fault.
Signed,
The World

After watching this report, I can't help but be disgusted with the rest of the world. Excuse me, World, but who has functioned as one of your major markets for export? America. Who has served as your 'police force' for many many years? America. And who has provided your former citizens with the opportunity to achieve their business and financial dreams as a part of our free market/capitalist ideals? America.

How dare you. How dare you point the finger in our direction. Don't pretend that you've exercised smart money and economic choices since the beginning of time. Don't pretend that we've never patronized your business and companies as American citizens. How dare you tell us that you 'told us so'. Really, how can you? How about you stop ganging up on us and help us through this horrible horrible time just as we've done for you in the past. Don't punish and blame the American taxpayer for what our goofy President has managed to do. Yes, we may have elected him into two terms. But don't forget the 48% of us that didn't and voted for the Democratic candidate. Don't forget about those of us who weren't old enough to exercise our voting rights, but are now taxpayers. Don't you dare penalize us for going against the grain in the first place and then generalize us into a population of irresponsibility.

I'm sure you're wondering why the title of this blog is a clean bathroom. It's mostly metaphorical. I'm a writer - get used to it.

Last night, I started to realize that my life isn't going to be as wonderful as I think upon my return to the states. I really missed my friends and my family last night after talking to them and realizing how much I wished I could be with them. I became frustrated to the point that I couldn't even pay attention to the TV anymore; I couldn't even write about how I was feeling; and I sure as hell didn't want to talk about it with anyone back home. So - I cleaned the bathroom. I started with the tiles on the shower wall. I scrubbed and scrubbed until there was no reason to do any more. Then I moved to the tub, which just took a quick spritz of cleaner and a light scrubbing with the sponge. Then, I moved on to the floor. Instead of mopping, I used a sponge and got down on my hands and knees to make sure it was clean. I moved across the floor and scrubbed the corners. Finally, I got to the toilet. The worst part. We hadn't cleaned the toilet since we first got here, and although we don't use it often, it had somehow gotten to be pretty disgusting. I'll spare you of the details, but remember, this is all a metaphor. I left the toilet squeaky clean for the time being. As I stood up to examine the bathroom in all its clean glory, I admired the stainless steel faucets and the shiny porcelain that I had just put my sweat and tears into. It was one of the most beautiful things I'd ever seen and I couldn't wait to get in there and use it now that it was cleaned out. However, to close this metaphor, I realized that I'd eventually be back in this position again - we'd use the bathroom irresponsibly, letting water drip on the floor, using the toilet - and eventually, we'd have to clean it up again. Just a simple, normal, regular cycle.